Jessy's Adoption Story Part 1
Picture taken at Sea World - Jessy and Robert were in the Dolphin Show!Jessy’s Adoption
Part 1:
This one will also be in parts ..so I can stay ahead and so it is not too time consuming for others to read… I’ll try posting once a week to give me time to finish it and not stress me out…
This one is going way back in memory as Jessy turned 13 last year! Robert and I got married in 1990 with big plans of course…plans to have a baby in two or three years and then consistently after that until we had about 3 or 4 and then adopt one at the end! Funny how we plan things out and forget we are not in charge! Robert is adopted, had a great life and we both wanted to adopt a child. There was actually not a thought that we wouldn’t adopt – we just planned on adopting. We had no idea it would be the first child and three more after that!
I had to go off the pill as it gave me migraine headaches. Instead, I would find myself dry heaving in trashcans in the garage on the way to school (to think now that I went through all that without needing to!!). It also made me feel like a time bomb. One minute I would feel nice and the next minute I would feel really angry! When I went off it I remember thinking, “I feel nice again!” What a waste of that 9 months! I didn’t even need the dumb thing! I was a much nicer wife and felt sorry for Robert having to deal with me on it!
Anyway – we started trying to have a baby in 1992 – month after month went by and no positives showed up on the pregnancy tests. We weren’t concerned the first couple of times but as the months went by, we started to wonder – probably after 6 months we started getting concerned. Doctors will not do infertility testing on you (well at that time anyway) unless you had been trying at least a year. When that year was up, we went to the best doctor out here in Poway. Of course, they couldn’t find much wrong with us. I had low estrogen (but some women do) and Robert had to take an antibiotic for some reason. Every time we went in they would say how “off the charts” our counts were, that Robert responded better to the antibiotic than any man ever etc. etc. I kept thinking they ought to hang our poster on the wall as “infertility couple of the year!” We would respond great to everything they did but not get pregnant. We didn’t feel comfortable doing in vitro fertilization (not that I have an opinion on it morally – it was $30,000 and the chances of a baby were slim). Going to the infertility clinic was so interesting in and of itself but hard at the same time. They would get my hopes up only to have them constantly dashed to the ground. Doctors would be sure they found a problem, try different things but still no baby. Please don’t let that discourage anyone who cares to read this – the infertility doctors have helped many people!
The clinic was a very interesting place to go. Of course, I asked tons of questions and was shown everything. One machine reminded me of the things in the Jurassic Park movies – when they opened it, steam came out and pressurized air make a loud hissing sound. I think it was frozen egg storage! They let me look through microscopes and basically showed me whatever we wanted to see! It was so interesting! They had tons of doctors there and interns, lots of research going on. Sometimes I felt like a lab specimen. There were times they would ask if I minded if so and so came in the room and by that point, I felt like “why not? Come on in!” I got to know everyone there as you end up going a couple times a month for various reasons. They told me I had a 2% chance of getting pregnant on my own but they always felt that if I could just get pregnant, I would probably be able to get pregnant again (funny – I did but miscarried all four times after Nathaniel). I tried various things, ended up having two surgeries – one to check for endometriosis, and a different one to fix a septum in my uterus that was dividing my uterus into two halves. I remember calling the receptionist who had become my friend and telling her we were finished and to say goodbye - I specifically remember telling her that I would call her when I got pregnant someday by the Lord…and I did 2 years later.
Part 1:
This one will also be in parts ..so I can stay ahead and so it is not too time consuming for others to read… I’ll try posting once a week to give me time to finish it and not stress me out…
This one is going way back in memory as Jessy turned 13 last year! Robert and I got married in 1990 with big plans of course…plans to have a baby in two or three years and then consistently after that until we had about 3 or 4 and then adopt one at the end! Funny how we plan things out and forget we are not in charge! Robert is adopted, had a great life and we both wanted to adopt a child. There was actually not a thought that we wouldn’t adopt – we just planned on adopting. We had no idea it would be the first child and three more after that!
I had to go off the pill as it gave me migraine headaches. Instead, I would find myself dry heaving in trashcans in the garage on the way to school (to think now that I went through all that without needing to!!). It also made me feel like a time bomb. One minute I would feel nice and the next minute I would feel really angry! When I went off it I remember thinking, “I feel nice again!” What a waste of that 9 months! I didn’t even need the dumb thing! I was a much nicer wife and felt sorry for Robert having to deal with me on it!
Anyway – we started trying to have a baby in 1992 – month after month went by and no positives showed up on the pregnancy tests. We weren’t concerned the first couple of times but as the months went by, we started to wonder – probably after 6 months we started getting concerned. Doctors will not do infertility testing on you (well at that time anyway) unless you had been trying at least a year. When that year was up, we went to the best doctor out here in Poway. Of course, they couldn’t find much wrong with us. I had low estrogen (but some women do) and Robert had to take an antibiotic for some reason. Every time we went in they would say how “off the charts” our counts were, that Robert responded better to the antibiotic than any man ever etc. etc. I kept thinking they ought to hang our poster on the wall as “infertility couple of the year!” We would respond great to everything they did but not get pregnant. We didn’t feel comfortable doing in vitro fertilization (not that I have an opinion on it morally – it was $30,000 and the chances of a baby were slim). Going to the infertility clinic was so interesting in and of itself but hard at the same time. They would get my hopes up only to have them constantly dashed to the ground. Doctors would be sure they found a problem, try different things but still no baby. Please don’t let that discourage anyone who cares to read this – the infertility doctors have helped many people!
The clinic was a very interesting place to go. Of course, I asked tons of questions and was shown everything. One machine reminded me of the things in the Jurassic Park movies – when they opened it, steam came out and pressurized air make a loud hissing sound. I think it was frozen egg storage! They let me look through microscopes and basically showed me whatever we wanted to see! It was so interesting! They had tons of doctors there and interns, lots of research going on. Sometimes I felt like a lab specimen. There were times they would ask if I minded if so and so came in the room and by that point, I felt like “why not? Come on in!” I got to know everyone there as you end up going a couple times a month for various reasons. They told me I had a 2% chance of getting pregnant on my own but they always felt that if I could just get pregnant, I would probably be able to get pregnant again (funny – I did but miscarried all four times after Nathaniel). I tried various things, ended up having two surgeries – one to check for endometriosis, and a different one to fix a septum in my uterus that was dividing my uterus into two halves. I remember calling the receptionist who had become my friend and telling her we were finished and to say goodbye - I specifically remember telling her that I would call her when I got pregnant someday by the Lord…and I did 2 years later.
4 comments:
can't wait to hear the rest Tracy!!
Oh goody- I love to hear your stories
Wow! Did this part of your story make me relive so many of my own memories! I can't wait to hear the rest!
you'd better not keep us in suspense for too long...although I do know the end of the story but it is neat to hear all the details.
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